What to do when someone is constantly rude to you?

You work hard, you make money. You do it for yourself. That is not life. You go out, you seek people who need your help, you make their lives better. You become that sponge that can absorb all the negativity and you become that person who can emit beautiful positive vibes. When you realize that you have changed someone’s life and because of you this person didn’t give up, that is the day when you live.

~Muniba Mazari

Challenges in life are like little distractions planted (for you) to waver away from the ‘why’ of your life. One of these obstacles often faced are the words and opinions of other people. It is impossible to always have like-minded people around you. Therefore, the average and often the usual response is people-pleasing. We work hard to comply and change ourselves according to the views of the people we interact with on a daily basis. That little extra effort to do something which you may not like, but still, do it to build that connection.

The problem arises when in spite of these efforts, you seem to be hitting the wall. People can be harsh, rude, unforgiving and show incapability to understand and empathize. Your efforts might be at times knowingly overlooked or undermined. Recently I came across a similar situation, which got me thinking, “Why? Why is this person so rude to me? What wrong have I done?” I tried to reason out, “Is this person rude only to me, or this is a general nature?” “Every time I am putting in extra efforts, hoping I will be able to build a better rapport, but everything seems to go in vain.”

For a while, I got deeply disappointed. The questions above I raised went unanswered every day, adding to my agony day by day. The good thing happened that these questions led me to a very important realization. This person was draining my energy, which could be directed to someone who actually needed my help and appreciated my efforts.

This sudden, but deep realization broke me out of the cage of thoughts that I had trapped myself into. It’s not me, it’s their problem. The person is currently incapable of recognizing the help and support I am offering. I may not withdraw the support, but I now need not bother about their rudeness. The moment I refuse to take their negativity, I can pay my attention somewhere better.

With these ideas, the above words by Muniba Mazari lead me on my new path ahead. This small incident has been helpful in practising to re-align my path to my life’s bigger goal. My heart is filled with gratitude, the rudeness broke me to re-assemble to be more loving and kind. It has put me back on my path to focus on the bigger ‘why’ of my life, rather than getting carried away by the insignificant why’s.

So in case, someone is being constantly rude to you, is their reaction worth paying attention to? Will it guide you on your life’s bigger picture? Mostly it won’t even matter in the long run.